Thursday, November 1, 2012

All I could see were two red eyes...


Today my family are going camping (boring). We get there and the camping
ground is so old and  scary. Oh well, I can at least play on my iPod. Oh
no, here's trouble, dad walks over and takes it right off me. "Help us set
up the tent." I could tell from that sentence that the trip would be
boring. After setting up the tent and having tea it's straight to bed.
Aaaaaaahhhhhh I wake up in shock to a creepy noise. I take a look outside
the tent all I could see we're two red eyes. Closer and closer then out
jumps..... My dog! Lucky he looks just as scared as me so I let him in the
tent.  At least I've got someone that won't tell me what to do.

13 comments:

  1. Great job, Billy!
    I like the way you use the prompt, and I like the happy ending. Your choice to write the story in the present tense makes it very vivid. Congratulations!
    Kind regards,
    Diethild - 100WC Team

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  2. Awesome work Billy!
    I like how you have included lots of suspense and

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  3. Well done Billy, I like how you have lots of suspense and humor in your writing.
    Is it 100 words?
    -Michaela

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  4. Well done! I really like how you diskribe the camping trip

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  5. Great job billy
    I really liked your story. I liked how you diskribe it and yours a great humor
    Georgia

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  6. Hi Billy
    I like how you used lost of adjectives and humour
    Sam

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  7. Nice story! I like how you used humor and suspence. I'm just wondering though why was the dog so scared? did a monster attack it or something?

    Jack

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  8. Hi Billy

    Awesome story.
    I like the humour you used.
    I would like to know how you came up with that idea.

    Bridget

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  9. Wow Billy that is a very good story i wish it go on on.

    Gracin

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  10. Sounds like you won't be going camping again. kurt

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  11. Hi Billy

    I really liked your story I also liked the adjectives you used. I hope you publish another one hundred word challenge for us. Where did you place in the challenge?
    -Josh

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  12. Hi Billy
    I like how you used adjectives.I really enjoyed your story
    Brya

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  13. Congratulations, Billy.

    I can see why you have been chose for the 100WC Week 7 Showcase. Well done!

    @RossMannell (Team 100WC)
    Teacher (retired), N.S.W., Australia

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